Boys' and girls' responses to singular versus repeated transgressions of their friendship expectations

Abstract

Children’s relationships with friends during middle childhood play a vital role in shaping their interpersonal competencies as well as their general socioemotional adjustment across development (Bierman, 2004; Glick & Rose, 2011; Ladd, 2005). Children’s friendships provide a rich context in which young people begin to develop expectations for peers and first encounter experiences of disappointment in close, voluntary relationships with others (Wiseman, 1986). Previous research and theory are clear that key gender and developmental differences exist in how boys and girls conceptualize their relationships with same-gender friends (Hall, 2011; Maccoby, 1998; Rose & Rudolph, 2006; Thorne, 1993; Underwood, 2003) and how they respond when these friends commit violations of their core friendship expectations (MacEvoy & Asher, 2012). Little is known, however, about the contexts under which these gender and developmental differences occur. Therefore, the present study was designed to examine associations among children’s friendship expectations and their purported style of responding to transgressions of varying chronicity (e.g., in response to singular versus repeated violations of their friendship expectations). This study also explored associations among children’s style of responding to transgressions and their socioemotional wellbeing. A sample of 245 third-, fourth-, and fifth-grade children from two elementary schools in the greater Boston area was utilized in the analyses. Mean- level similarities as well as differences emerged in boys’ and girls’ responses toward friends who had committed transgressions of their friendship expectations. Regression analyses further showed that gender moderated the relationship between friendship expectations and children’s endorsement of revenge goals and aggressive strategies. Lastly, gender and grade-level were also found to moderate the relationship between children’s endorsement of revenge goals and aggressive strategies and their feelings of loneliness, but not friendship quality. Overall, findings highlight that boys and girls share many similarities in their responses to friendship expectations transgressions; however, they also embody distinct strengths and vulnerabilities in their styles of managing these violations. Clinical and developmental implications are discussed.